"Avoid the 'Page 10' Rejection"

(The following article is reprinted from the May/June 2009 edition of the Scriptwriters Network's online newsletter, used with permission. Thanks to Susan Bridges, the Scriptwriters Network's wonderful newsletter editor. The article was authored by Sylvia Cary, a talented writer and a wonderful human being, as well.)

"Avoid the 'Page 10' Rejection"

“In order to receive favorable script coverage, you must learn to consider things from the reader’s point of view,” explained script consultant James Jordan to members and guests of the Scriptwriters Network on January 17, 2009, at CBS Studios on Radford in Studio City. They’d gathered to hear Jordan talk about the crucial “First Ten Pages” of a screenplay. “Industry readers typically decide if a script has potential within the first ten pages,” he said. “Yet most writers seem unaware of what is required in those pages. So their screenplays continue to get rejected at literary agencies, production companies, and in contests. We’re going to talk about what to put in -- and what not to put in -- those first ten pages to increase your chances of making the cut.”

Networking, Not Luck

Jordan started off his presentation by debunking the notion that “Hollywood is a lottery. It’s really all just about luck.” He stressed that it is actually about professionals in high levels of responsibility choosing to work with others they know personally. It is not about luck; it’s all about relationships.

To illustrate this point, Jordan asked the Scriptwriters Network Program Director, David Mulligan, to pick out somebody he knows personally from the crowd, which Dave did. . Then, Jordan asked the woman that Dave had picked to select someone she knows in the crowd, somebody she can vouch for. “Guess what,” Jordan explained, “You have just witnessed how Hollywood operates in action. This exercise is meant to show you that in Hollywood, it’s partially about who you know; and all about who knows YOU. It’s about being able to vouch for people. Naturally, people feel more comfortable making referrals on behalf of people they know rather than strangers they can’t vouch for.

To be the screenwriter that somebody else picks to work with, you have to be known. How do you get known? By networking and interacting with other people. The very best way to guarantee your script will be read from cover-to-cover is by having people read it who know you. Networking will get you known and help you to avoid the “Page 10 Rejection.”

The Resume Analogy

Jordan then offered the “Resume Analogy,” explaining this was the key to getting better coverage. “Think of your screenplay like a resume. You e-mail your resume for a job, but there are 1,000 others with resumes ahead of you. The poor Human Resources guy who must review 1,000 resumes will certainly not spend much time considering each applicant’s resume. Maybe each piece of paper will get several seconds of scanning … until the HR guy spots something he doesn’t like, and then your resume is in the pass pile.

Hollywood works the same way as that HR department. A story department of a major production company or literary agency is dealing with hundreds of scripts. Readers are not encouraged by their bosses to spend time reading scripts that don’t meet professional standards. This is not screenwriting class; this is multi-million dollar business. So, unless you blow a reader’s socks off by page ten, your script will probably hit the “pass pile.” Even if the reader keeps reading the script to completion, they rarely change their opinion after page ten. Let’s look at it logically: A weak script on page ten is not likely to improve beyond page ten. So keep this resume analogy in mind the next time you reach the page ten-mark in your script. Ask yourself the most important question of all: “Based on my logline, would any reader keep reading beyond page ten of my script? Have I hooked the reader with a compelling story that begins to explain my logline?”

Hollywood has “gatekeepers” (story analysts) whose jobs are to keep unprofessional scripts from reaching busy executives’ desks, so first you need to get past them. Then, your script must be recommended by senior personnel who have anxiety saying yes to any script; there is always a risk to championing a project, but not nearly as risky to pass on projects. They are concerned about the “what ifs” – for example, what if a movie they "greenlit" doesn’t “open” well? .So, as a writer, your job is to overcome every possible objection.

Here are James Jordan’s 20 basic tips to help you:

1. Marketability: Consider the commercial appeal of your script. You may want to avoid writing an expensive period piece until you have at least one major screenwriting credit. This is actually the most important decision that you must resolve before you proceed any further with a screenplay.

2. Title Page: Include only the script title, your name, and the contact information (your name, phone and email) in the lower right-hand corner. Don’t bother with addresses, faxes, etc. If someone likes the script, they will call or email you.

3. WGA Registration Number: Don’t include this. It is a red-flag that screams “amateur.”

4. Scene numbers: Never put them in your script. Scene numbers are for a production draft. You are submitting a writer’s draft.

5. Page Numbers: Always include these. Brads get removed to copy script pages. People need to be able to see those page numbers to make sure pages don’t accidentally get put back out of sequence.

6. Avoid Being the Director: Don’t use “CUT TO” or other camera references. Best to also avoid “we see” and other wording that reminds readers that it is a script they are reading. Standard screenplay format is already intrusive enough. Don’t frustrate the reader even more by including anything that will take the reader away from engaging in the story on an emotional level. Avoid “Continued” on top and bottom of pages; it is unnecessary. However, always keep the Character’s name with blocks of dialogue. Do not allow formatting software to separate names from dialogue.

7. Length: Keep script length under 120 pages. Keep comedies under 110 pages. Long scripts from unproduced writers get passed on very quickly.

8. Typos: Proofread carefully, including the dialogue. A typo on page 3 can hurt you. Most readers hate typos.

9. Protagonist: Establish your main character by page 3. Your description of this character and the first words out of your main character’s mouth can set the tone for the whole script. Actors will also pay attention to this and ask themselves, ‘Is this a character I’d be interested in playing.’ Your protagonist is your movie. If you expect to cast a major actor in your story’s lead role, then that actor needs to appear very early in the screenplay or they will find a script where they do.

10. Rooting Interest: If the reader doesn’t care about your protagonist, then the reader will have no reason to recommend the script. You must show the reader why this particular protagonist and his/her story is worth the attention of even the most jaded reader.

11. Get to the Point Quickly: By approximately page ten, the script should have begun to illustrate the story as explained in the logline. If not, then expect many readers, agents, and producers to pass on the script. If busy people liked your logline and agreed to read the script, you had better provide a script that gets to the issues fast and hooks the reader. Unless you have previous major film credits, you do not have the luxury of time on your side. Time will be your enemy.

12. Minor Characters: Don’t introduce, give names to, and develop characters that will soon be dropped from the storyline. The first ten pages is where your characters will forge their emotional bond with the story analyst.

13. Character Names: Avoid giving characters similar sounding names, or even names beginning with the same letter, or containing the same number of letters (JOHN, JANE, DICK, FRED). It can be confusing and trip readers up. Let the individual nature of each character also be reflected by their name selection.

14. Experiment with Breaking Gender Stereotypes: Have a male nurse and a female construction worker. Your characters will stand out more.

15. Descriptions: Avoid large blocks of narrative descriptions. At the very least, attempt to divide the larger blocks of text into smaller blocks of no more than four lines of type. Be concise. Few in Hollywood will read long descriptions.

16. Dialogue: Follow the 4-line dialogue rule of thumb. Save longer blocks of dialogue for the most dramatic emotional moments. These longer blocks should be few and far apart.

17. Subtext: Even more important than what you choose to have your characters say is what you choose to leave out – the subtext. Great dialogue speaks volumes with just a few words. Study your favorite film. Study the dialogue carefully. Why did the dialogue appeal to you so much? The answer most likely will be found in the subtext.

18. Voiceovers and Flashbacks: Avoid these if you can, or use sparingly. Do what you need to do to tell the story, but keep these techniques to a minimum. They pull the reader out of feeling the emotional connection of the moment.

19. Tone: Establishing the tone is a must during your first ten pages, but you better start on page one! Comedy has to be funny and make you laugh. A thriller has to scare you. If you can’t get the story analyst to respond emotionally to your script, you won’t get favorable coverage, period.

20. Rewrites: Professional level screenwriting is one of the most difficult occupations on the planet, and doing rewrites goes with the territory. That’s why Hollywood pays so much for those relatively few who have mastered the craft so well. If you aren’t finding it difficult to write well, then you probably aren’t doing it right. If Bruce Joel Rubin, Tom Schulman, William Goldman, and other brilliant writers must constantly rewrite their scripts, then you must be prepared to endure the same struggles. But since you don’t have their track records, your writing must sparkle even brighter to get buyers’ attention (or they will simply keep buying scripts from big credited writers). Rewriting is about improving the script. It is part of the process. So don’t be concerned if your script needs lots of work. Everyone’s does. If it was easy, then everyone would be selling scripts!

After answering numerous questions from the audience, James Jordan concluded: “You have to figure that today it costs basically a million dollars per page of your words to make a studio movie, so you’d better choose those words very carefully.”

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Sylvia Cary, MFT, licensed psychotherapist and writer, is Director of Marketing for the Scriptwriters Network and a long-time member. She has published four books; has two scripts under option, and has a “book-doctor” called Therapists Who Write Editorial which focuses on helping healing professionals get published. Contact at: SCary@scriptwritersnetwork.org or http://www.therapistswhowrite.com/.